The following piece is from the Undressing Disability Hub, of which I am the current featured member. It seems that you have to be a member of the Hub to access the featured member profile online, so I am reproducing it here.
I wrote a promotional piece about the Hub, which can be viewed by clicking on this link.
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Hi everyone, I’m Nathan, a wheelchair user living with a progressive genetic disease. I am a divorcee and have lived independently for the past 11 years as an author, activist, poet and blogger.
I joined the Hub as a way of finding the necessary support to discover solutions to the sexual frustrations that the majority of disabled people find themselves living with. It seems to be an unfair consequence of living with a disability, but I see no reason why we can’t all enjoy healthy, intimate relationships.
I am interested in helping disabled people live on a level playing field with the rest of society. This includes living and enjoying healthy sex lives. There seems to be no easy answers, as we need to change perceptions of disabled people. We are all sexual beings and deserve the opportunity to explore this natural part of life.
At the age of 16, I was diagnosed with Friedreich’s Ataxia – a progressive, genetic disease of the nervous system. I’ve been a wheelchair user since the age of 18. The sands of time are moving quickly and I now find myself at the age of 44, still trying to find happiness.
As well as living with Friedreich’s Ataxia, I am also locked in a struggle with two familiar bedfellows of this progressive genetic condition – loneliness and depression. These negative emotions are exacerbated by the fact that I cannot fully function in the sexual game of life, despite being in possession of all the necessary equipment and having a healthy sex drive. I have been robbed of all dexterity due to the effects of FA. I shouldn’t have to paint a picture of the limits this means that I face. The options open to most men with regard to sexual release just aren’t there for me.
In the eleven years I have been divorced, I am proud of what I have achieved. I am the author of two books, I have been awarded an Honorary Fellowship for my work in Disability Rights by Glyndwr University and have led the successful #SaveWILG campaign to help protect independent living for those with high support needs in Wales. This is in addition to maintaining and designing my quirky bachelor pad and travelling across England and Wales.
However, I remain unlucky and frustrated in my relations with the opposite sex. I was hoping that by joining the Undressing Disability Hub, I would be able to discuss the barriers and potential solutions with professional experts.
A couple of years ago, I wrote the following blog. This may interest you and will give you an indication of my situation.
https://nathanleedavies.wpcomstaging.com/2019/11/24/open-letter-to-whom-it-may-concern/
